Who’s there?
“Monicolointzgee.”
Monicolointzgee who?
“You’re joking, right?”
Come in. Oooohh. Ugh!
“What’s wrong sir?”
Nothing…nothing…Miss Monicolointzgee.
Ablo, can you come in here right away? Over here Ablo, so that I can whisper…so’s miss Monicolointzgee can’t hear us.
“Yes sir.”
Ablo, you said she was pretty. She’s got a bit of a moon-pie face, don’t you think?
“Now that you mention it sir…”
Never mind Ablo, close the door behind you.
Now then Miss Monicolointzgee can you please slide down here under my desk. Very good, now get to work.
“But isn’t this illegal sir?”
What?
“What you’re asking for isn't conducive to procreation. Aren’t we at war with the Blue’s over such behavior?”
That’s alright…I’m a politician. We’re above the ridiculous laws we make. Now there, that’s a good girl. Ooops, got some on your pretty blue dress. We’ll just call that a souvenir. No harm in that is there?
“Not at all Mr. president. I’ll just hang onto this stained dress, and cherish it…until I need it for some unforeseen court appearance.”
And I’m told that you brought me some cigars? What a kind gesture.
“Yes sir. Here they are.”
They’re all sticky. How did they get sticky?
“I’ll have to whisper that part into your ear. Whisper…whisper.”
Ewww…that’s disgusting.
The door bursts open
“Good news sir. We bombed the aspirin factory…er I mean the prophylactic factory as ordered. It was a great success. Several hundred civilian casualties. That’ll teach them to thwart the procreation laws sir!”
No…we can’t have them thwarting the procreation laws can we?
“No sir, we can’t. What’s that on your dress Miss Monicolointzgee?”
“That’s the thing that dreams…I mean wars are made of.”
“What?”
Never mind her. She’s just a blithering intern. You say that the mission was a terrific success. That’s wonderful news Ablo, let’s celebrate.
Have a cigar!