Ablo, I’m glad you talked me into visiting one of our local schools. It makes it look as if I care. Will there be any babies to kiss? That always makes a good impression.
“No sir, this is a High School.”
Never the less there should be some good photo ops. There sure are a lot of cameras pointing at us, we better make this look good. Let’s visit a classroom, shall we?
“Classes havn’t started sir, but we can walk around the school building and check out the facilities.”
Look over there Ablo, by the gymnasium, it’s one of the teachers. He’s lying on his back and fiddling with something! He must be psyching himself up for the day. I want to talk to him.
Excuse me sir, what is it that you’re doing?
“Sir, perhaps we should talk to someone else, this man seems to be…well…busy.”
Nonsense Ablo. Sir, is this some sort of experiment your performing on yourself for the benefit of your class?
“Nope! I’ll be honest, I saw some cute sixteen year old girls in the walkway coming into the building, and I couldn’t resist milking the mongoose while I pictured them naked.”
So you teach Biology then?
“No, I’m greasing the crankshaft. You know…Taming the Shrew!”
So you teach English Literature then?”
“Could you be more dense? I’m popping the cork! Pulling the old crankshaft! Milking the Goat! Are you daft?”
That covers so many different subjects. Ablo, I’ve got it. This old codger must be….a substitute teacher! Damn but I love word games. I’m a crackerjack at Jeopardy you know!
“Sir, I think Mount Aetna here is about to erupt. We need to give this man some privacy…while he prepares for his…lessons.”
Taming the Shrew was one of my favorite books Ablo. What a wonderful teacher he must be. It’s a good thing we do background checks on these guys, otherwise we might accidentally let in all kinds of perverts.
“We can’t have that sir.”
They do make wonderful politicians though!